His brother's words were poison shooting through his veins like a drug addict on heroin. “Father and mother hated you, I am the only one they loved”. Those deadly words continued to ring in his head threatening to destroy his reality, and he knew his brother was right. He was the one they never wanted; a runt twin outshined by a brothers talents. He also knew that he wasn't all the things his parents hated, and he had some good qualities too; slowly releasing the cold heavy gun from his grasp he finally realized that there was something to live for.
Sincerely,
R.J.Ropsen
Great post! You've done a fantastic job of expressing the series of emotions he's going through.
ReplyDelete@ Angie Thanks, this story was a littler harder for me to develop. These painful emotions are a tough subject to portray.
ReplyDeleteSo well written. I was wrapped up in the emotions. I think you really handled the pain and anguish of the material beautifully.
ReplyDelete@ Lillie Thank you so much! I love writing for your five sentence fiction. It is a wonderful idea!
ReplyDeleteWow, such strong feelings created by your wording - "those deadly words", "a runt twin outshined...", I'm glad there was a happy ending or it might have spoilt my afternoon :)
ReplyDeleteKate
@ spring days It is definitely one of the darker pieces I have written. Maybe next week I will try to write something a little more uplifting. :)
ReplyDeleteI could feel the pain...well done!
ReplyDeleteWow - buckets of tension, sibling rivalry. I want this guy to find his future...nice one R.J.
ReplyDeleteThanks for all the wonderful comments!
ReplyDelete